Foundational Truths Archives - Page 5 of 5

THE NEXT GENERATION

I probably know too much…

I hear the pain of a bride that saved herself until marriage, met the man of her dreams, fell in love, and fully gave herself to him. I hear the pain of finding out her young husband isn’t all that interested in sex because years ago he had been seduced by the images in pornography. He would rather spend time with a screen than learn how to love his wife.

I hear the pain of a young mom once again answering to the effects of sexual abuse at the hands of her uncle. She thought she had dealt with it, but the pain in her voice and tears on her face say something else. Now with young children, the burden of protecting them rips open her wound in a new place.

I hear the cries of a generation growing up where living together before marriage is the answer to growing up in a broken home. Marriage is reserved as a capstone after experiencing as much of life as you can before settling down to the boring regimen of marriage to raise a family.

I hear the regret of the girl that succumbed to the power of turning a man’s head by using her body to feel loved, desired and needed. Struggling to find freedom with the man that God has now bound her to in marriage, she repents and asks God to erase the memories and make her new.

I hear the pain of growing up in a generation where watching porn as a couple is normal. Instead of making sex better by increasing intimacy, you make sex better by adding some new thrill or even person.

I hear the pain of living in a world where even pictures from phones can be photo shopped to remove your wrinkles and blemishes. No longer are you just comparing yourself to the stars in the magazines, but to your friends posting on Facebook.

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by Ruth Buezis May 13, 2015

REMEMBER

I just reached the three year anniversary of teaching Awaken Love classes to wives and it has me feeling more than a little emotional and sentimental. We were sharing today in bible study how important it is to look back and REMEMBER and to see how God has worked. So today, I look back and REMEMBER.

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by Ruth Buezis April 21, 2015

CRAVE your husband

My husband and I have always had a good marriage, and once we got things figured out, our sex life was good – but it is completely different now!

We used to have sex when my hormones surged, or I was feeling guilty because it had been too long. For me, the hormone surges occurred around ovulation and right before my period. I decided whether the gate was open, and my patient husband waited for the signal.

I often hear that for men sex is physical, but I look back and realize that sex was completely physical for me. I let my hormones determine when I wanted to have sex.

My sex life has changed drastically since I have a new understanding of God’s design. I CRAVE my husband and the connection between us. I miss him and actually get grumpy when sex is not happening.

It’s kind of like running. When I first started running, it was painful, it was drudgery, and it was the last thing that I wanted to do. After running on a regular basis for several months, it gradually got easier and it became something I looked forward to. I missed it when I couldn’t run.

But if you only train once a week, running will never get any easier, and it will never become something you crave. It will only be drudgery.

The longer women go without sex, the more we could care less and the less responsive we will be. The more sex we have, the more we will desire it and the more responsive we will become. This is a well-known fact that most women agree with.

So if we desire for our sex life to become more than our hormones driving us, what do we do?

First, we have to get our head on straight. We need to realize that God created sex for us as much as our husbands. Even though we may never have a hormonal drive like our husbands, sex is important for us. Think about how connected you feel to your husband after great sex.

Second, we need to make sure that we are having great sex. We must be present, getting to know each other, communicating our needs and enjoying things that work for us as well as our husbands.

Third, we need to have sex often enough that we miss it when it is not happening. I will not give you a magic number, but you must recognize after a certain amount of tiime, you desire your husband less, and at some point you desire him more. Wouldn’t it be an awesome thing to get where you miss him? Could you actually get to the point where you CRAVE your husband?

by Ruth Buezis March 15, 2015

Awaken Love Classes

People have asked, “what is your vision for Awaken Love classes,where do you see it going?”

I’m never quite sure how to answer, but over and over, I hear myself saying, “I would love for more women to start teaching classes, women from all over the place.”

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by Ruth Buezis February 26, 2015

9 Things I’d say about sex if I had no filter

I am joining the bandwagon of Christian Sex Bloggers with 9 Things I would say about sex if I had no filter. Kudos to Julie Sibert at Intimacy in Marriage for getting us started.

1. We are in a battle to save marriage – rather than pointing our fingers at others we ought to be looking at ourselves. Does our marriage look different because we are enjoying the intimacy and freedom that God intended for us? Do our kids look at our marriage and think to themselves, “that is what I want.” Great sex is part of a great marriage.

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by Ruth Buezis February 17, 2015

Back at It

It has been almost a month since my last post. My daughter got married in our back yard, out of town family came and went, and daughters were packed up bound for college. Summer has flown by and the time to sit down to think and write just didn’t happen. There were several times that topics came up that I wanted to write about, but I felt like I could not do them justice in the little time I had.
The longer I went without writing, the harder it was to start. The longer I went, the more I felt like I didn’t even know where to start. The longer I went, the more I doubted whether it really even made a difference.
It sounds kind of familiar, doesn’t it? It sounds kind of like sex….
The longer I go without sex, the harder it is to enter into it again. I get to the point where I can just take it or leave it and I have to make a conscious decision to make it a priority.
The longer I go without sex, the harder it becomes to respond. I recall many times when I have told my husband, “what if I don’t remember what to do?” It has taken a patient husband and me trusting him enough to gently reawaken my body.
The longer I go without sex, the more I doubt how important it is for my marriage. Does sex really make a difference, or maybe we could just live together and be best friends.
Sex does make a difference, it is a big deal. It is one of the ways that God connects me to my husband and He makes us one. Sex creates the difference between best friends and marriage, it makes us one.
And so today, out of an obedience to strengthen marriages, I choose to sit down and write. Today, out of a knowledge that it will get easier, I start typing, and wrestling with the words, and slowly things start to flow easier. Today, I trust that God will make a difference in some ones marriage.

by Ruth Buezis August 21, 2014

Women of Strength

Saturday I leave for a week with the senior high as we head to Frontier Lodge in Alberta Canada for an adventure camp filled with climbing, repelling, canoeing, and mountain biking. Our theme for the girls is “Women of Strength” and I’ve been spending some time thinking about what a woman of strength looks like…

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by Ruth Buezis June 12, 2014

Good girl – Bad girl

I picked up a new secular sex book at my favorite thrift store this week called The Good Girl’s guide to Bad Girl Sex, written by Barbara Keesling PhD. In the first chapter she shares that” being bad” does not mean being immoral, pornographic, behaving dangerously, demeaning yourself, or being indiscriminate with your sexual partners. “Being Bad” means loving sex, being physically uninhibited, feeling sexual hunger, being assertive and unashamed, fully integrated and intensely orgasmic.

Isn’t it amazing how backwards we have it?

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by Ruth Buezis May 29, 2014

Welcome and Foundational Truths for Wives

Welcome to Awaken Love. I pray that you will find a safe environment, centered on God’s word, with detailed, respectful information about sex. God wants us to have amazing sex in marriage. But it doesn’t just happen. We have to intentionally work on it. We have to sort through lies, deal with baggage, learn to communicate and educate ourselves about our bodies. But we also need to learn to connect during sex. I want to help equip you information offered on the blog and classes taken in groups, to not only improve your own sex life, but to help others.

It is time for the church to remove the silence around sex and to start speaking truth.

Below are the foundational truths that I believe for women in their sex life.

Read them, pray about them. Do you believe them? Do you live them? Do you have the courage to pursue them?

Foundational Truths for Wives

God can transform you and your marriage.
God created sex for wives as much as for husbands
Sex connects us to our spouse in ways like no other thing.
In order to have freedom in our marriage beds, we must get rid of the lies about sex, free ourselves from our baggage, and see ourselves as beautiful unique creations.
We must believe (submit to) our husbands when they tell us they love our bodies.
Communication is key – If our husbands cannot trust that we will gently ask for what our bodies need, than they are left to wonder and we are left unfulfilled.
We need to help our husbands by helping them expand their playbook for us.
God created us to experience much more than we realize and it is when we are open to new possibilities that he can show us.
Christian wives should be having the best sex ever and should encourage
other wives in their sex lives.
We need to be fully committed and not hold back. Our husbands want all of us and so does God.
Our marriages must give our kids something to look forward to and a reason to wait to have sex until marriage.
Sex is much more than intercourse, it is seeing each other naked and unashamed, and in a sense, worshipping God through His creation

by Ruth Buezis January 11, 2014

Category: Foundational Truths

THE NEXT GENERATION

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REMEMBER

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CRAVE your husband

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Awaken Love Classes

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9 Things I’d say about sex if I had no filter

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Back at It

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Women of Strength

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Good girl – Bad girl

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Welcome and Foundational Truths for Wives

Foundational Truths for Wives

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Buy the book

Category: Foundational Truths

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Foundational Truths for Wives

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