Every once in a while, a hand job can blow your husband’s mind. But a great hand job requires more than just good technique. It requires a certain attitude that says, “I’ve got you. I find your penis amazing and you turn me on!” When you have the right attitude and you understand some important basics, then the world is in your hands.
I’ve Got You
When you have the confidence to take charge, your husband can relax. You need to make it very clear to him, that it’s your turn to have some fun. Determine how he sits or lays so that he can enjoy the view. Place his hands above his head or at his sides to clearly communicate you’re in charge.
Wear something that teases and tantalizes him like a black lace bra. Entice him while just out of reach. Cover your hands with coconut oil and stroke his chest while moving toward his pelvis. Lube up his entire pelvic area and smoothly stoke his thighs and around the base of his penis to get the blood flowing. Make sure that he understands he gets to relax and enjoy the view.
Show him something new. Don’t just take him on his familiar straight line ramp up to orgasm. Reassure him that you know what you’re doing and he can trust you. Show him a path filled with teasing, twists, turns and eventually an intensity and connection that can only lead to surrender. Tune into his body and show him what great sex would feel like to you.
You’re Amazing
Our husband wants to know that his penis amazes us. To vulnerably share himself by exposing his greatest joy he must know that we treasure him. We must connect not just with our hands, but with our eyes and our soul.
Watch his penis grow using light touches, teasing or soft connected strokes. Play with his penis and watch how it responds. See how it seeks out your touch. Create a solid rhythm of strokes to generate intensity and build excitement. Gently play with his testicles and watch them ripen as arousal builds. Feel his shaft stretch for more stimulation as orgasm nears. As his perineum throbs with pleasure, feel the fluid course through his body. Our husband’s body is God’s amazing creation. We ought to be filled with awe.
You Turn Me On
Treating your husband to a hand job creates an amazing connection that ought to turn us on. When we see how vulnerably our husband shares his body with us, it ought to touch our heart. He has to trust us when we tease him or when we touch him in a new way. When we watch his eyes on us, we realize just how much power we hold. The power to create, the power to discover, the power to love. Arousing our husband ought to arouse us. Have your husband sit up just enough to see while you straddle one of his legs. If we are connected during sex then arousal builds as we watch the other become aroused.
Basics
Use coconut oil to lubricate his penis, testicles, perineum and entire pelvic area. Play with him for a while to slowly warm him up. Alternate playing with his penis with stroking his inner thighs and pelvic area to release tension. Use his testicles to gauge when to back off stimulation and extend the experience.
The head of the penis can be highly sensitive. The shaft enjoys lots of long connected strokes. His sweet spot is the ridge of the penis, the area where his mushroom shaped head meets the shaft. Stroking past the ridge ramps things up.
Early on stroking can be playful and varied. Eventually you will want to establish some consistent patterns or rhythms that his body can get in sync with. You can always change things up, but the rhythm becomes a theme to return to over and over and build upon.
Some men enjoy gentle fondling or tugging of the testicles – but be gentle and ask for feedback. As arousal builds, support the base of his penis with your free hand. Have a towel ready for easy clean up.
Ramping Up
Many options exist for ramping up arousal – don’t just think speed. Let me share a few options…
- Lock eye to eye and move slowly with intensity and confidence.
- Match his yearning with the strength of your grip.
- Hold just the base of his penis and massage his prostate through his perineum.
- Gradually ramp up speed and pressure together in a crescendo.
- Gradually focus the stimulation, for example change from a full hand stroking to 3 fingers to, 2 fingers, to 1 finger rounded against the thumb.
- Gradually focus location of stimulation – change from stroking the entire shaft to stroking just past the ridge
Arousal Paths
Endless possibilities exist for arousal paths but let me share a few distinct ones.
- A gradual build of arousal until orgasm. The path most common for men.
- Build arousal, then back off for a while followed by building again to orgasm. Be careful not to frustrate him but reassure him that you have a plan. If he enjoys the ride and as you gain confidence, repeat as many times as desired until you clearly lead him to the finish.
- Gradually build arousal until almost at the tipping point. Fine tune stimulation to see how long he can ride the wave until he gently tumbles over.
Specific Strokes
Though mechanics are just a small part of a great hand job, below are a few ideas to get you started.
- Pulling Taffy – stroke his penis by pulling from the base all the way past the ridge, alternating hands.
- Corkscrew – a variation of pulling taffy with a gentle twisting of the hands while pulling
- Endless Tunnel – opposite the pulling taffy, create an endless tunnel by stroking from the head to the base, alternating hands.
- Ring – Make an OK sign with your thumb and pointer finger to stroke his penis. The ring creates a very focused stimulation.
- Full hand – The bread and butter of strokes. A full hand stroking up across the ridge and back down to the base. Pay special attention to catching his ridge as you pass by. Your free hand can be used to fondle his testicle, stroke his pelvis, or press into his perineum.
- Hand cross – To create a tight chamber, hold one hand vertical with your thumb out. Clasp around it palm to palm with the thumb in the v and the fingers wrapped around the side of the vertical hand. Makes sure to tip your finger back on the vertical hand so that the ridge of your palm catches the ridge of his penis.
Finishing Thoughts
When your husband finishes, strong and steady to the end. Follow his lead if he urgently asks or grabs your hand. The head of his penis will become ultra sensitive. Hold his shaft firmly or slowly milk his shaft as his muscles contract.
Hand jobs can be an incredible way to get to know your husband and to give him pleasure but mechanics are just the tip of the ice berg. Tune into feeling his body, how relaxed or tense he is. Learn to sense when his arousal builds by feeling his penis, hearing his breathing and watching his testicles. Take charge, discover new paths, enjoy the view and be amazed at God’s creation.
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WOW!! I was thinking that every wife ought to know this information. I was also wondering how in the world to teach young wives how to do this? Thank you for taking the lead here and starting the conversation and teaching these wonderful techniques to wives. You are making some very grateful husbands!!
Without getting too graphic, as a husband I enjoy HJ’s on the rare occasion my wife gives one. As husbands during inteecourse we often have to work on achieving Climax. With HJs we can relax, feel our body’s sensations, and truly feel the clomax going through our bodies. One properly given can be better than sex itself.
Problem is I live in a sexless marriage and my wife doesn’t enjoy touching below the waist at all. 🙁 Great post tho.
Praying for opportunities to connect and love your wife in intimate ways.
Good information for wives!
Great post! I used to love it when my spouse would give me a handjob in the 69 position, my all time favorite. She hasn’t given me one for a long time now, due to health issues and I think she thinks the cleanup is too messy.