Recently I received a special request to write an article on vaginal intercourse rear entry positions so I am going to give it a whirl.
Rear entry used to be my least favorite position, but a lot of things have changed. So let me shed some light on some of the challenges of this position for women, adaptions that can make it more enjoyable, and why eventually it might be awesome.
Challenges
Anybody that has ever seen animals mate has the position of rear entry burned into their mind. This is the position that animals use when the male decides to do his thing. There is no foreplay, no kissing, no connection. He just does it. It is hard not to associate rear entry with being used and animalistic behavior.
Some wives may assume that if a husband wants to try rear entry, it is because he does not want to see her. That he is simply using her body as a receptacle. Just because you are not face to face does not mean that you cannot create a powerful connection.
Attitude Adjustments
You must trust your husband enough to know that he is NOT just using your body. For most men, one of the reasons they love rear entry is because they actually love the view from that position. It may be hard to accept, but your husband loves to see the curves of your rear and your waist . He loves to watch his penis disappear inside of you. He is visually engaged with you and that should be erotic.
In the safety of marriage there is room to enjoy some of the raw sexual energy that God gave us. Sometimes it is not about the slow sensuous movement but about the pounding of bodies. Do not be afraid to express yourself through sex and get excited when your spouse expresses himself. In other words, animalistic is not necessarily a bad thing sometimes.
Some women miss the visual connection during rear entry positions. After all, a husband is watching his wife, but a wife may be just looking at the bed or the wall. Think outside of the box on this one. You can put your head down and watch through your legs. You can turn your head to catch a glimpse of your husband’s enjoyment. You can use a mirror to catch the action or you can even imagine in your head what it looks like. Engage your mind. There is a power and energy during rear entry that should get your blood pumping when you see it or visualize it.
Adaptations for Connection
It is important during rear entry positions to maintain a connection through touch. You need to feel your husband’s hands on your hips, waist or rear. You need to draw his hands to your breast. You need to even feel his thighs plastered against yours. Make the connection about more than feeling his penis in your vagina.
During rear entry position there is absolutely zero clitoral stimulation by the penis so there are two paths to consider.
- You could focus on g-spot stimulation. In the doggie position a wife can tip her hips, and lower and raise her body to adjust the angle. Remember you are aiming for the front wall of the vagina only about 1-2 inches in. The goal is for the head of the penis to firmly push across the g-spot. Slow down the in and out movement that creates friction and have him slowly explore pressure points with the head of his penis. Try focusing on the sensations created as the head of the penis pulls in and out of the entrance of you vagina. Play around and when you find something you like, follow it.
- You could add stimulation to the clitoris using your hands, his hands or a small vibrator. The added stimulation can become thunderous when combined with his pounding.
Variations
There are different variations of rear entry, each with its own flavor.
Spooning can meet the needs of a lazy morning of cuddling and can allow a husband to wrap an arm around to your clitoris, another to your breast and enclose you in his care.
Doggie style can allow infinite adjustment of angle for g-spot stimulation while giving him a stunning view. It can allow you to strain and arch as you engage your body to create tension. You can feel the strength of his hands on your hips as he melds his body to yours.
Him standing while you lean over the bed can notch up the energy even more as you feel the strength of his movement and the collapse of his body onto yours.
Rear entry is about entering into the eroticism of a husband that is thrilled by your body and that desires to consume you. You must have the confidence to trust that he would never just use your body. In other words, sex is not just physical for him – he is loving you and sharing himself with you. Don’t be afraid to figure out what makes the rear entry enjoyable for you by adding clitoral stimulation or to play around with the movement and angles to hit the right spots. Stay connected visually, and by touch. Thrill at the strength of your husband and rear entry can be a whole new flavor to enjoy.
The Author
I had a long post typed up about how much I love this position, in great detail, but decided it may be a little much. All I can say is, I LOVE THIS POSITION!! Everything you said is spot on!! I hope this position is talked about more by you, because I think it’s amazing!
Thanks for a respectful and enthusiastic comment.
Ruth
You’re welcome! My “other version” wasn’t a “little much” for the content, more the length. 🙂 I had responded to all your various points, but then realized it was several paragraphs, so I edited down to convey my enthusiasm. Now on reading it, you probably have this image of me with pom poms. 🙂 Suffice it to say I think that it’s incredible for a lot of reasons, namely that it’s helped our connection as a couple.
Thanks for this post. We’ve never tried this position, for many the reasons you mentioned. Maybe we should try and see if it gives us fireworks!
We started using this position after we got pregnant, and it works great for that too. We’ve been able enjoy sex throughout my pregnancy because of this position, whereas we would’ve had to stop months ago with out it. Thank you for the tips too, some new things for us to try!
I raise animals for breeding. My birds are rough. It is pretty much like a violent rape when they mate. But my mammals….oh yeah, there’s foreplay. I actually get jealous of my female rabbits because they get better foreplay than I do. Grooming, nuzzling, back massages, kisses, even “oral sex.” I’m lucky I get a chance to wake up!
I agree that it is important for our husbands to bring us along with foreplay to awaken our bodies in order to be ready for them. Can you imagine waking to a generous husband treating us, and having a hard time deciphering whether it was a really great sex dream, or it was actually happening – what a treat. Sex is intended to be sometimes mutual, sometimes giving and sometimes receiving – and a balance is important.
I am so on the opposite end of this. “Doggy” is my all time favorite position, along with rear vaginal entry me on my tummy and legs closed as my beloved enters me. However, its not a position he cares much for or at all. It always feels like begging when I mention changing positions to the aforementioned. He prefers face to face, wrapped in each others arms missionary. I love the feeling of my husband behind me and letting loose, and sadly when we do go to that position within just a couple minutes he ends up soft. I love his hands upon my waist exploring me as he is behind but for what ever reason it leads to the whole situation falling flat. We end up back in the vanilla missionary position and I find myself staring at the ceiling hoping he can “finish up” soon, because now I’m bored and in a way unfulfilled. I do not expect this “animalistic” sex every time but I truly LOVE this position and feel short changed those times we actually engage in it due to it being so short lived. Any suggestions? By the way I was not trying to be graphic in detail, but more so trying to explain my ordeal with hopefully polite description.
Amarie,
I think you need to have a gentle, respectful conversation about the situation outside of the bedroom so that you both can understand each other better and yourselves. Why doesn’t he like rear entry? Is it because he has some past baggage, or it feels dirty because he has viewed porn and now limits himself? Has he ever enjoyed this position? what has changed? It might be just a random case of him becoming soft in this position that has caused him to worry every time he is in this position and thus resulting in loosing his erection once again. Whatever the case, seek to understand and hear him and not necessarily fix the problem or add more pressure. Let him know that you want to support him.
I think you also have to ask, why are you so bored in missionary position and staring at the ceiling? Can you learn to enjoy this position more, with eye to eye contact, or adjusting your hip position for better stimulation. Your being disappointed when you have to change positions only puts more pressure on your husband and makes him feel like he has failed.
Sex is not always easy and yet thru the hard times that we go through together, intimacy is created.
Ruth
“Rear entry is about entering into the eroticism of a husband that is thrilled by your body and that desires to consume you.”
Do you truly mean “consume?” That feels disrespectful to me. Products are consumed. I do better with something like “a husband who desires the thrill of sexual pleasure and oneness with his wife.”
IntimacySeeker,
Song of Songs 5:1 says, “Eat, O friends, and drink; drink your fill, O lovers.”
In a marriage built on trust, you can enjoy your husband “drinking his fill” without worrying that it is ever about disrespecting you or hurting you. It is simply him wanting to fully have you.
“have” “consume” “use” are all disrespectful terms because they indicate expendability and are connected with sexual objectification in our culture today.
I don’t ever think of my husband having, consuming, or using me. I think of him enjoy, experiencing, and taking delight in me. I am a living, breathing, human being created in God’s image.
Intimacyseeker,
I am not going to continue to argue about the interpretation of the meaning of the word “consume”. There are many meanings and I am sure both negative and positive connotations depending on personal experiences. Yes you are right that one definition is “use up, or destroy” -That is NOT what I was trying to communicate.I can only speak for myself when I say that when I look up the definition of the word, the definition that resonates with the intent of my article is, “to feast on, or drink up”. I simply find it exciting that my husband wants to enjoy me. That is what I am trying to communicate.
Blessings to you,
Ruth
I do not think I have ever brought philosophy or academia into my bedroom. When I want sex with my husband, the last thing I think about is which politically correct term should I describe him or myself as. I just want to make love to him or have sex with him, have fun with him, Enjoy him or let him enjoy me. Whatever the case it is usually very nice. The rear entry is my favourite and I have never had any feelings of any negativity about it. I grew up on a farm where all our chickens, cow and bull, goats, sheep did it that way. it is the natural position to me. The missionary is good if I need to discuss some issue while he is inside my and we are close and relaxed. But the rear entry is a about having good and proper sex. On my belly, legs together, and my behind raised a little.
Thanks for your insight. It is funny how something so normal to animals can start getting so distorted to us.
Great article! I love this position now, but I didn’t always like it. Mainly because it can hurt if you don’t do it right. I hope someone will try it out that has never tried it. It can be really awesome for both of you. In front of a mirror is also a great idea if you want to see what is going on.
I just wanted to add some more comments to this thread, particularly after reading Amarie’s. I love this position for the same reasons – I love when my man is able to let loose and really go after me…the pounding you mentioned in the post, Ruth. Without letting it get completely out of hand, I prefer a more intense version of pounding. There is something about that pace combined with this position that is why I am so enthusiastic about it! I sometimes wonder if there are others like me, so I appreciate what Amarie said.
To Ruth and female reader. Thank you! I need your encouragement and would love to read female readers longer version as my husband loves this position and sometimes we do it but I have had trouble in the past enjoying it because of some objections that are common, …but the animalistic stuff being a farm girl and all is the big one?? I am growing and learning and married for over thirty years and my husband is as daring and adventuresome as ever. He is a really good man and lover and I do not appreciate it as much as I should but am trying and Ruth your willingness to lay it out be positive and straight up is so helpful. Keep it up.
Thanks, glad it is helpful.
As a husband, I will say that communication is very important when trying new positions for love making. Rear entry can be a win-win for both spouses. It adds variety to the love making and can be done in different variations. Wives can tell their husband what angle works best for them.
Rear entry does allow for more vigorous thrusting by the husband, but the position can be mutually satisfying as this stronger thrusting gives a greater intensity and greater immediacy to the pleasurable sensations that both spouses are experiencing.
ive only been able to do this once.ever since then my wife and i cant get it to work again. its frustrating since.we both want to. just.cant get inside her from behind
You may be having trouble because she is tense, or the angle could just be wrong. Have her tip her but up, make sure you are well lubricated and have her slowly guide you in with her hands.
weve tried.so.many things. i just cant reach her anymore for some reason. and of course the more i fail at doing it the more i want to.
Don’t force things or pressure her. The more tense she gets, the more problems. Relax, take the pressure off and enjoy some other things for a while.
yea, basicly been doing that for the last 8 years. We’ve done so many ways but this one is just not happening. its now on our bucket list…somehow someway we’ll do it that way
Maybe it is just the shape of her body. She could ask her doctor about it…
I love this position for the intimacy, the the feel of her cool, soft buttocks, the view, even the unique sound of our thrusting/bouncing together. It gives me deep penetration, that always gives me a big orgasm. And a big turn on is that she loves it also.
Recently, I stumbled upon this amazing post and thread and read some of the comments. This position definitely stirs passions – it has long been a favorite of mine, and my wife is increasingly into it as well and has repeatedly mentioned picking up the pace significantly. She’s even used the phrase, “Unleash on me.”
Given our mutual desire to do so, is there any reason not to really just go all in on this idea?
That is up to the two of you.
Great post. I’ve only done this position once but I really enjoyed it.
I know it is an old post, but it is very helpful. I like that you say “because you are not face to face does not mean that you cannot create a powerful connection”. My wife, however, would strongly disagree. No matter how much I beg, she has refused to try the rear entry position. She said it would be degrading. I, obviosuly, thought about it, and it seems that it comes down to the fact that for my wife maintaining emotional intimacy during sex is absolutely vital. We only make love in missionary, and I think she craves that close intimate sex because it her need for emotional validation and reassurance. She basically said that doggy style is not making love and she wants me to make love to her. I am at a loss. Thanks.
Be patient and respect her wishes and desires.