Don’t Wait Until a Marriage is in Crisis

” I’m learning so much and hope to be able to use what I’ve learned one day. I will pass the information on to my daughters to hopefully prevent them from making the same mistakes I have made. Thank you so very much for your class. I wish I had found it earlier in my marriage, or even a couple of years ago. We would be in a different place I am sure.” former student

Women in Crisis

Sometimes women whose marriage is in crisis sign up for an Awaken-Love class on the advice of their marriage counselor. Years of neglect and damage lead them to a desperate attempt to salvage their marriage. With nothing left to lose, they sit through six weeks of discovering God’s desire for their marriage bed. All the while wishing they had known the truth earlier or done something sooner.

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Webinar – Claiming the Gift of Sex with Dr. Jessica McCleese

I had the pleasure of joining Dr. Jessica McCleese for a webinar called Claiming the Gift of Sex. We talked about some of the differences between men and women as well as God’s Design for Sex. Check it out.

What it looks like to claim the gift of sex in marriage

Lasting Impacts of Awaken-Love Classes

Yesterday I had the opportunity to speak at a moms group in the Twin Cities. Several women took the Awaken-Love class 9 months ago and recommended that I speak on sex.  While there, I got to reconnect with the women and hear the lasting impact from class.

Live Classes

One woman shared how eye opening the class felt when many of her assumptions about sex and about her husband did not align with God’s word. Even though she had grown up in the church and remained active, she never felt like they had provided any real answers. Left to her own assumptions and influenced by silence, awkward talks, and cultural messages, she landed where most women do – sex as an obligation to fulfill her husband’s needs. Conversation in class about God’s real intent for sex had literally shifted her mindset 180 degrees and continues to impact her marriage and attitude today.

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Creating Community at Awaken-Love

When I first found Christian sex blogs, I quickly realized that I learned as much from reading the comments as from the articles. The information authentically shared by individuals gave me a window into the struggles and triumphs of men and women just like me and my husband. But this window didn’t just inform me, it spurred me on towards growth. As I heard the testimonies of others I began to believe that God could change me too. Community creates growth, whether in person during an Awaken-Love class or anonymously on the Awaken-Love blog.

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How Do You Invite Someone to a Sex Class?

I remember the very first time I invited women to an Awaken-Love sex class. I was scared to death! Who would I invite? What would my friends think if I brought up the topic of sex? What if no one responded or better yet my friends stopped talking to me?

Many of you may have had the same thoughts as you considered hosting an Awaken-Love video class.

But you’ve read enough on the blogs to realize just how desperately wives need resources to encourage them in their sex life. You want to help. You want to do something, but you don’t even know where to start.

One Woman at a Time

Awaken-Love started as a grass roots effort. Out of obedience, I invited 8 close friends into my home because I heard God’s call to teach about sex.  And I believe Awaken-Love will continue to be a grass roots effort. As women experience transformation through Awaken-Love, they will catch the vision and feel compelled to share with friends.

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Why I Facilitated an Awaken-Love Video Class

Beth contacted me last Spring and I’ve asked her to share why she decided to facilitate Awaken-Love Video classes at her church in Ohio. 

I am not sure how I stumbled across the Christian Marriage Bloggers Association website.  What I do remember is what followed: an intense exploration of the marriage blogs listed in their directory.  Considering I had never read a blog before, I was fascinated.

Finding Awaken-Love

Several of the blogs really resonated with me and Awaken-Love was one of them. Thru the posts on the site, I was beginning to get a view of the marriage relationship in a whole new light. My husband and I had met young and between dating and marriage, we have been together over 37 years. You could say we knew each other pretty well . And yet…these articles seemed to hint at an area, a depth of intimacy that we might not have experienced.  As the saying goes, “You don’t know… what you don’t know.” The Awaken-Love site left me wondering what we didn’t know.

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Invite God into Your Marriage Bed

During Awaken-Love class we often talk about how to bring God into our marriage bed. The huge divide between our spirituality and our sexuality leaves us feeling like sex is somehow wrong. When women invite God into their marriage bed, they experience a renewed sense of freedom but sometimes they don’t  realize all the amazing benefits. 

Today, Abbey who recently joined the Awaken-Love teaching team, will share how inviting God into their marriage bed profoundly impacted both her and her husband.


Awaken Love taught my husband and me many things. Most importantly it taught us to invite God into our marriage bed.

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A Video Facilitator Shares about Awaken-Love

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to take a group of friends through the Awaken-Love Video Class? Or where you would even start?

I’ve asked one women to share in general ways about her experience facilitating.

I want to take a moment to share with your readers about my experience with facilitating a video class. I hope  to inspire you to get a group of girlfriends together and have the fruit of this life-changing class!

Once I had a date set, I shared with a friend that I would be facilitating an Awaken-Love class. The news seemed to take on a life of its own as friends shared with friends.  I think there is such a hunger among women to have a safe place to talk about some of these intimate topics where Gods wisdom is present. I ended up with several women taking the class, many of whom I didn’t even know.

As part of our Step by Step Guide to facilitate a video class, we include sample invitations to invite your friends. Many women email the invitation in order to avoid a face to face conversation.

I was a little nervous about how it would all go. I really am not an expert on this topic. I was also worried about having some awkward silence where I didn’t know what to do.  As it turned out the videos and facilitator guide helped me walk through and we ended up with very rich discussions.  Some class nights, we didn’t make it through all the videos in the time we had so participants watched them on their own.  The videos made it easy for me to relax and let the class unfold.

I will say that the ground rules established at the beginning of class were super important in guiding our discussion.  As people gained comfort, we covered many topics that I cannot imagine ever discussing outside of the context of the class. The confidentiality and judgment free aspects of the class really helped people get the most out of it.  Everything that was needed to maintain a healthy and safe environment had been thought through and was communicated in the videos.

It was such an incredible privilege to watch how God worked in the hearts and marriages represented in the room.  I have been a part of many women’s bible studies over the years and none have had quite the impact that this study does.  I continue to be SO blessed in my marriage because of what I learned through the Awaken-Love class and I know the women who went through the six weeks with me were too.

If you want to strengthen your marriage and the marriages of your friends, host an Awaken-Love Video Class. You can invite women from small group, your marriage group, mops, neighbors or friends.

If you don’t know where to start or have questions, feel free to contact me.

My Partner in Life

Jim has been my covert partner in Awaken-Love for over five years. More importantly, he has been my partner in marriage for 30 years. We have been through so much together and Awaken-Love would not exist without him.

Jim went years without giving up on me or becoming resentful when sex happened only once or twice a month. 7 years ago, when I experienced huge growth in my faith and sexuality, he stepped up and grew with me. He has held me in his arms as I cried out to God questioning my calling to teach about sex. The poor guy has been my Guinea pig as I tried out new ideas and techniques in bed, Hah!?. Jim has helped me to understand and write about the men’s perspective of sex. He has edited my writing, acted as a sounding board and encouraged me. I would not have started Awaken-Love without Jim and I would have given up years ago without him by my side. This November, Jim and I will teach another MEN’S EDITION of Awaken-Love and I figured it was time I introduce him to you.

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Taking an Awaken Love Class on Your Own

You can take an Awaken Love Video class on your own even though it is set up for groups of women. Sometimes women just aren’t ready or willing to take the class with other women. Though the experience will be different, it can still provide the benefit of reading great books, listening to the videos and wrestling with  what you believe about sex.

In order to help you understand the pro and cons, I am sharing  feedback from one of the women who took the Awaken Love Video Class on her own.

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