Woven Together – A Comfortable Manual Stimulation Position

Many women describe orgasms from masturbation or manual stimulation as their most physically intense and well defined orgasm. Because there is less distraction than during intercourse, women can focus on what they feel and experience. Hands and fingers  provide plenty of clitoral stimulation and orgasms can top the charts. But sometimes it’s hard finding a comfortable manual stimulation position.

(more…)

Touch Through the Layers

Before you got married, do you remember how hot you got when all you could do was touch each other through layers of clothes?

Taking advantage of a fabric barrier can be a great way to change things up. Feeling thru fabric can tease, entice, create new sensations and just plain be fun!

(more…)

Trying to Be Quiet Adds to the Excitement

Trying to be quiet during sex is tough!

We have gotten used to an empty house and the freedom to be as loud as we want, but recently we took an adult vacation with another couple. Spending time with my husband in the mountains, touring God’s creation could only lead to one thing – great sex. With our room right next to the other couples, we had to be extra quiet –  but in a way, it just added to the excitement.

(more…)

Masturbation in Marriage

Masturbation in marriage happens all the time.

One spouse is usually hiding it…

and the other spouse is either naïve and oblivious, or ticked off and hurt.

Doesn’t seem like the best scenario, does it?

As Christians bombarded by the message DON’T DO IT, or just COMPLETE SILENCE, it is easy to feel like all masturbation is bad – even in marriage.  However, for some couples, masturbation within marriage can fit into God’s design for sex. Masturbation can make the two into “One” or helping them “know” each other better. This has been one of the huge areas of growth in my marriage. In Awaken-Love classes, I find it to be a topic that can be both surprising and liberating for Christian women.

(more…)

Priorities

cropped-milacs-pictureMelanie came to Minnesota this weekend for the first time. We drove thru snow, and walked on a frozen lake. We also experienced the spring thaw that leads to wearing t-shirts in 55 degrees. The two dimensional rooms of my house that she had only seen thru skype became real spaces that form the walls of what I call home. She met three of my daughters and ate dinner as part of our family. She held her own in the sparring spree of wit that never ends.

Retreat

Melanie came to join me at a winter retreat I started hosting five years ago when God placed in me a desire for more intimacy. Intimacy comes from many places -God, our spouse, our family and our friends. This retreat was born out of a desire to have intimate connection with friends.

At retreat 20 women talk, eat, worship, serve and pray together. Instead of listening to a speaker, we spend time sharing stories of how we have seen God. Our focus this year was how we have experienced God’s healing in our lives and asking for more.  While sharing testimonies, we heard amazing stories of God’s goodness and power. We spent time alone asking what we needed to dig up, lay down,  or unwrap. We asked God for what we needed and wanted and we worshiped Him.

photo-shootPriorities

During the weekend, Melanie and I got some much needed time just talking. We talked about how we met our husbands, how they proposed, the mistakes we have made, our insecurities and about what God is telling us. Over and over we are reminded of the importance of keeping our priorities right – God, our husband, our kids, and then everything else. For us, a lot of the that “everything else” is Awaken-Love.

Melanie and I have always encouraged each other that we don’t want Awaken-Love to become a full time job. But honestly, for me, it is. With my family grown, my husband has blessed me with the opportunity to spend my time devoted to Awaken-Love. Even though I thrive on ministering to people thru Awaken-Love, I have to be so careful to not let things get out of balance. I do not get my worth out of Awaken-Love. The only thing that matters is that I love God and I am following Him. As I sink more and more into full time ministry, I realize the importance of not just staying glued to my husband, but glued to God. Without Him nothing else matters. I do this for Him and because of Him.

And so whether you are working on your marriage,  your sex life, helping others or whatever passion God has place on your heart – be careful to keep God at the top.

Guard yourself from worshiping what God does in your life.

Worship God Himself. 

Next Monday, we start an awesome 4 week series called Getting to Know your Wife’s Body.

Are you willing to fight for it?

Sea-Anemone

Yesterday I was supposed to write a blog and I just could not bring myself to do it. My husband and I were still in the middle of working through something that had popped out of nowhere in our marriage bed the night before, and I was still too raw.

It amazes me how vulnerable I am in my marriage bed. I like to say, I am like a sea anemone. I gradually open up, until my tentacles are freely flowing in the current, enjoying being tossed about with the movement of the tide, receptive to new experiences and comfortable receiving whatever comes my way. But when I am totally opened up, my most sensitive spot is also exposed. My deepest, most personal, most private self is laid out for my husband. He knows me like no one else, but it is not easy, because all it takes is one little prick to that most sensitive spot, and I immediately close to protect myself.

(more…)