Have you ever thought about the power of stillness?
To feel a pulse
Hear from God
To listen to our own bodies and desires
Sometimes I think that we have this idea that sex is all about movement – in and out, back and forth, frantic motion – trying to make something happen. So much motion that we get lost and dizzy and miss out on what is there all along.
In order for a husband to take her to the wall, she must trust him. He must be so in tune with his wife that he knows when and how. Women have this romantic notion that a husband taking us will be the hottest thing ever. But when it comes right down to it, women are control freaks. Many of us don’t handle surprises well. We cannot expect our husbands to take us without helping them out. Sensitive husbands may be err on the side of being, kind, considerate, and using lots of foreplay . That does not really jive with”being taken.”
Words transport women. That is why women devour romance novels and erotica. Hearing words can take us to a different place in an instant and it can be arousing and erotic. I suspect if husbands understood how powerful words were, they would be a little more interested in learning how to use their words to transport their wife.
The last few years I have realized how bad a job I have done at creating a safe place for my husband to share. I was reminded the other day when I slipped back into my old pattern of reading way to much into my husband’s comments.
I have this amazing husband that loves to teach Sunday School to young kids. After class on Saturday night, as we were walking out to the car, he said, ” You know, I could teach Sunday school every week.” My immediate reaction was, “Don’t you ever want to sit with me during church?”
My poor husband found himself back pedaling. Trying to explain that of course he liked sitting with me in church. All he was really trying to say was that he loves teaching kids. But through my filter of insecurity, I immediately questioned whether he loved me.
I am embarrassed to say that just a few years ago, because I was often overly sensitive to my husband’s comments, he essentially stopped talking to me.Read More »Safe Place
One of the familiar challenges for menopausal women during sex is a lack of lubrication. Really the lack of lubrication is just one of the symptoms of reduced estrogen due to the natural aging process. Estrogen helps keep our tissue young and supple. Without it, things can quickly fall apart. Intercourse can become painful due to lack of lubrication. Thin tissue and bladder infections can become problematic. Decreased Estrogen causes all kinds of issues.
The other night in class we were talking about the reasons God created sex. I asked, “What does it mean when the Bible says God makes us into ONE?”
Silence filled the room until one woman began to share. She said, “The other night, my husband and I had a disagreement, and then my husband starts making a move on me. In the past, I would have just gotten mad, or brushed him to the side. This time I made the choice to get on board. We had sex, and the amazing thing was that afterward, the disagreement didn’t seem like such a big deal. We easily worked through the problem.”
Matthew 19:5 – For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh
I used to think that when we got married and had sex, God made us into One – end of story.
Sometimes sex is more about the connection than anything else. We enjoy the pleasure – but we just want to feel so in tune with… Read More »Side by Side Position
Coital Alignment Technique is one of the best ways for women to reach orgasm during intercourse. A slight twist can make the position feel so… Read More »Laid Back – a Variation on Coital Alignment Technique
After years of buying into the same old messages about sex, Ruth went searching for God’s truth and discovered something radically different. By sharing her own journey to sexual freedom and the stories of the women she’s taught, you will come away with a new mindset about sex and a deep-seated belief that God designed each of us unique, special – and created for delights.
Copyright © Ruth Buezis, Awaken-Love and Christian Sex Class, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s authors and/or owners is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Awaken-Love with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
