Skip to content

Ruth Buezis

Let's talk about anal sex.

A Respectful, Frank Discussion about Anal Sex

Educate Ourselves

Anal Sex has become part of today’s world. Regardless of whether or not you have any personal interest in the act, I believe we need to educate ourselves. People are engaging in anal sex in unhealthy ways both outside and inside of marriage. Women are coerced and pressured to do things that can only result in pain and damage. While other Christian couples believe anal sex creates intimacy because it requires profound trust, communication and sensitivity. For them, anal sex communicates love through an intensely vulnerable act.

Please resist a quick judgement “that nobody should do it” and allow yourself to learn.  The goal of this article is to neither condone nor condemn anal sex, but to educate. You get to decide what is right for your marriage bed and how to talk to your kids. But instead of just saying “don’t do it”, let’s spend some time wrestling with the topic.

What does the Bible really say about anal sex?

How come anal sex is becoming more main stream?

What are the health implications and cautions surrounding anal sex?

These are just some of the questions we must wrestle with ourselves and be prepared to answer for our kids.

If we don’t want our friends, kids or grandkids to get their information from Teen Vogue or Pornography then we must equip ourselves to comfortably talk about today’s issues – and anal sex is one of today’s issue. Even if your son or daughter never deals with anal sex, maybe they will help empower a friend to make good choices.

Read More »A Respectful, Frank Discussion about Anal Sex

Today’s version of Sex Education – Teen Vogue?

Teen Vogues article in July 2018 titled Anal Sex: What You Need to Know – How to do it the RIGHT way created an uproar from both parents and conservatives. People were alarmed about the subject matter and whether Teen Vogue has the right to provide that kind of information.  The article really just resurfaced the timeless issue of sex education. What is the difference between appropriate knowledge to help kids make good choices and information that leads to poor decisions?

Who should educate kids and what if they aren’t?

Read More »Today’s version of Sex Education – Teen Vogue?

Learning to Dance as One

“We danced last night”, were the first words that she whispered to her husband as she awoke.

In a way, it had seemed like a dream.

The movement of bodies, not in unison, but in symphony. Not one doing the other, but oneness.

In Genesis 2:24 it says “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”

What if “become” is not a one time thing, but a lifetime thing. Maybe “become one flesh” is not just what happens when we get married or every time we have sex. What if “become one flesh” is this endless journey of being made into one by God.

Read More »Learning to Dance as One

Taking an Awaken Love Class on Your Own

You can take an Awaken Love Video class on your own even though it is set up for groups of women. Sometimes women just aren’t ready or willing to take the class with other women. Though the experience will be different, it can still provide the benefit of reading great books, listening to the videos and wrestling with  what you believe about sex.

In order to help you understand the pro and cons, I am sharing  feedback from one of the women who took the Awaken Love Video Class on her own.

Read More »Taking an Awaken Love Class on Your Own

Letting Our Husband Lead

Let me say up front, I have not read the book “Fifty Shades of Grey”.

I have read enough about the book to get the general idea of the plot and the characters, and I have a theory about why women are so attracted to its pages.

We want our husbands to lead.  We want them to lead in bed, and sometimes we even want them to lead strongly.

Not in the twisted way that this character from “Fifty Shades of Grey” does, but with a selfless love of a husband that knows his wife.

We want our husbands tuned into our needs and our bodies so they know exactly what we want… maybe even before we know. We want them to hold us with a gentle firmness that says “I’ve got you.” We want them to explore us with the attention that they are utterly enthralled by our bodies, even when we feel insecure. We want them to take us down a path so confidently, that we can trust them, and stop worrying whether or not we will respond.  We want our husbands to lead.

The problem is…. we are awful at letting our husbands lead.

Read More »Letting Our Husband Lead

Moving Forward for Awaken-Love

This summer I asked 3 couples to join Jim and me and form a leadership team for Awaken-Love. I asked couples because

The mission of the Awaken-Love ministry is to encourage men and women to claim God’s design for intimacy and equip them to share that truth with others.

I believe that just like Christian women, men need good resources about sex. The church must go beyond helping men stay pure and provide resources to help them create a great sex life with their wife. Jim and I have been teaching Awaken-Love Men’s Edition but we are praying about how to make the class available to others in the future.

Read More »Moving Forward for Awaken-Love

The Challenges of Enjoying Oral Sex

Oral sex can be one of the sweetest ways for your husband to pleasure you but it has it’s own challenges.

Song of Songs 4:16

Awake, north wind, and come south wind!

Blow on my garden that its fragrance may spread abroad.

Let my love come into his garden and taste its choice fruits

fruit

One of the most intimate ways you can allow your husband to “know you”, is through oral sex. Your husband will see, feel, and even taste you in ways that he has never experienced before.  If you surrender and allow yourself to just receive from you husband, you will experience some of the most delicious orgasms possible.

Read More »The Challenges of Enjoying Oral Sex

How to Have an Orgasm if you never have…

As I sat down to write an article on how to have an orgasm, a good friend texted wondering what I was up to.

“Not much”, I said, “Just writing a post on how to have an orgasm.”

“Step by step instructions?”, she texted back.

“Not exactly step by step. It doesn’t really work that way. Does it?”

“Sometimes.”

“What are the steps?”, I asked.

“1. This is your crotch. 2. Locate your clitoris. 3. Rub”

Wise counsel from a wise friend, but seriously, sometimes figuring out how to have an orgasm just isn’t that simple.

If you have never had an orgasm, don’t give up. Just because you haven’t had one yet, doesn’t mean you can’t or won’t. Many of us took months or even years to learn how to orgasm the first time so you are not alone. Learning how your body works takes time and energy but it is well worth the investment.

Read More »How to Have an Orgasm if you never have…

Barriers to Having Great Sex

Things exist that create barriers to having a great sex life. Sometimes they impact our mindset and other times they steal our energy. Sometime we need to change them for ourselves and other times we need to be part of the solution for others.

I want to share the barriers to having a great sex life  that I have recognized in my own life and inspire you to identify your own barriers. We need to get on the offensive to proactively battle our barriers in order to claim God’s good gift of sex.

Read More »Barriers to Having Great Sex

The Importance of Community

Something powerful happens when people minister to each other about sex.

When we get rid of the silence and start sharing our stories and experiences.

God moves.

Sometimes that starts through the anonymity of commenting on a blog. I remember the first time I found Christian sex blogs in 2011. The comments impacted me as much as the actual articles. Reading questions women posted and the replies, encouragement and prayers that followed blessed me and gave me hope. I am glad you are part of this community and I pray that you will find a safe, encouraging environment that always points back to God’s truth, grace and goodness.

The more I read about the state of sexuality in our culture the more I consider today an opportunity for change. The church, parents and marriages are becoming painfully aware that “now” is the time to do “something”.

“Something” starts by bringing sex into the light by talking about it in good and healthy ways. We must create safe environments that teach God’s amazing design for sex but that also extend grace and encouragement for growth. Community may happen initially on blogs where you can be anonymous. I hope and pray that someday you will encourage and minister in person to others in your church or friendship circles.

Read More »The Importance of Community

Buy the book

After years of buying into the same old messages about sex, Ruth went searching for God’s truth and discovered something radically different. By sharing her own journey to sexual freedom and the stories of the women she’s taught, you will come away with a new mindset about sex and a deep-seated belief that God designed each of us unique, special – and created for delights.

Buy Now
Find a Class Now

Copyright © Ruth Buezis, Awaken-Love and Christian Sex Class, 2017. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this blog’s authors and/or owners is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Awaken-Love with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.