Have you ever thought about what sex looked like in the Garden of Eden? I imagine the first time Adam saw Eve, he was instantly mesmerized. Someone finally like him! Yet her differences were what really caught his eye. The curves of her body, the softness of her skin, even the way that she walked and talked.
Adam must have had a hard time keeping his eyes off of Eve as her body magnetically drew him. When he gently reached to touch her, the curves of her body fit perfectly into his hands. Unafraid, Eve trusted him and immediately relaxed into his touch. Gently he explored and caressed listening for the purr of her satisfaction.
The more Adam touched her, the more Eve’s body woke up and became hungry for him. As his body covered her, the wetness drew him into her. Suddenly aware of becoming “one”, he laid still for a moment, in awe of what had happened. As she gently smiled at him and they looked into each other’s eyes, they slowly began to move together until eventually they fell into a puddle of each other.
Even though sex felt exciting and wonderful to Eve, she knew there was more to discover. Filled with playfulness, she anticipated her turn to explore. The way his penis grew, and sought her out reminded her of the small fury animals that loved to be pet behind the ears. She wanted to see it, touch it, stroke it and even to feel it against her lips…
I’d better stop, lest I cross some lines…
Adam and Eve enjoyed total freedom in the Garden of Eden – with their own body and their spouse’s body. With no preconceived idea of what sex looked like they simply craved intimacy and connection. Unafraid to be known they fearlessly expressed themselves through words, movement, or even the groans when words would not come. Void of all expectations, they didn’t worry about performance or what they looked like. Without past wounds, they didn’t recoil at touch, or wonder about intentions. They loved watching what happened and were amazed at God’s creation in each other. They simply enjoyed God’s goodness and reveled in new discoveries.
Living in a Broken World
Our world looks nothing like the Garden of Eden. Media has filled us with images of what sex is supposed to look like. These ideas stunt our own creativity and cause us to drive toward orgasm rather than exploration. Media and magazines cause wives to exchange their husbands’ compliments for insecurities or self-hatred. Pornography and Erotica dirty our ideas of sex, causing some to discard almost everything while others clamor to recreate scenes. We cannot even discern our ideas from something we saw or read. Performance anxiety plagues both men and women and steals the joy of sex. Silence from our families and churches leave us feeling stunted and awkward instead of open and free. Sex feels like anything but a blessing.
A Taste of Freedom
But what if God intended sex in marriage to be a taste of the freedom Adam and Eve experienced in the Garden of Eden?
- God’s original intent for us before sin entered the world.
- Before we started hiding and blaming each other.
- Before we began to covet and lust after what we cannot have
- When we had no wounds and no fear
How Do We Move Towards God’s Original Intent?
God cares about us and knows every detail and hurt – even involving our sexuality. He wants you to be free from the lies and deception that the world offers. If you are still immersed in lust than take the battle seriously. Be honest, get help and go after God. If you are hanging onto past sins, then receive God’s forgiveness and forgive yourself. If you are wounded then go after healing through counseling and prayer. Find your worth from Jesus and He will guide you.
Trusting God causes us to know that our past does not have power over us. Trusting God helps us to value honesty more than perfection in our spouse. Lustful images that tainted our minds can be replaced with beautiful memories that husband and wife make together. When God asks us to get naked, we can get naked, because we would rather be known then hide behind a leaf or blame our spouse.
Jesus paid the price for our sins, and He redeems us. He has torn the veil so that we can have face to face relation ship, not only with Him but with others. Every day He gives us a fresh start to get up and LIVE again.
Creating the Garden of Eden
Don’t try to create what the world defines as great sex, but what God intended. Let yourself be known by sharing all of yourself, even your insecurities or brokenness. Create a safe place for your spouse to be honest and known. Focus on connection instead of orgasm. Bring God into your marriage bed. Pray before sex and ask Him to bless your connection. Ask for His truth and discernment as you make choices together. Make your marriage bed a journey of discovering God’s goodness. Receive the freedom and gifts that God gives you.
Regardless of your past experiences, or your spouse’s past struggles, do you trust God with your sexuality? Will you seek His truth and desire for your marriage bed? Is God, all powerful, able, and good? Do you believe He can heal and give you a fresh start? Do you want a taste of the Garden of Eden?
If your spouse is unrepentant about sexual sin, and not actively seeking healing, then please set boundaries and seek help.