Learning to Dance as One

“We danced last night”, were the first words that she whispered to her husband as she awoke.

In a way, it had seemed like a dream.

The movement of bodies, not in unison, but in symphony. Not one doing the other, but oneness.

In Genesis 2:24 it says “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh.”

What if “become” is not a one time thing, but a lifetime thing. Maybe “become one flesh” is not just what happens when we get married or every time we have sex. What if “become one flesh” is this endless journey of being made into one by God.

Somehow, last night they had stopped thinking – and  had just felt. He had  disconnected from what he should be doing, or worrying about how to get from point A to point B. She stopped trying to protect herself from disappointment. They had just felt.  It was free, it was refreshing, it was spiritual.  

It was like the difference between “people that dance” and “dancers”.


“Stop counting, just feel it”, urged the dance instructor, as they cha-cha’d across the floor. Would she ever be able to let go and just trust her body to feel the beat of the music. Would she ever become so in tune with her dance partner, that she could stop thinking and just move with him.

I have to be honest, I don’t know a whole lot about dancing. My husband and I took ballroom lessons 25 years ago. As a couple of white engineers, we mastered counting the basic steps, but dancing is so much more than using your head.  Dancing is about feeling the music, expressing yourself and moving as one. Counting will only take you so far, but when you allow your body to move and feel and express  – well, then it is dancing.

So how do we learn to dance?

It takes time…If marriage is a lifetime of getting to know each other, then sex ought to get better and better the longer we are married. Are you really spending time with your spouse, or are you even there. Spend time together, have lots of sex and dare to be real.

It takes trust….Trust your spouse, trust yourself, trust your body,  but most of all trust God.

It takes stripping away….Before you can show yourself, the walls of protection must be stripped down. Stripping away the walls mean understanding when and how those walls were built, and asking God for healing and restoration.

It takes God…God desires so much for us. He created our amazing  bodies to experience so many things, and yet we choose to live in our safe little boxes. Begin to ask God for more. Take time to experience more of Him and more of life. Dare to live big.

Originally Posted as The Dance on Dec 15, 2014

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