My doctor could tell I was anemic before she even tested me. Unaware of the result of a gradual worsening of my periods, feeling tired and slow became my norm. I will never forget the day that I ended up in the hospital because of a flow that literally poured out of me. Of course by the time I was seen, the flow had slowed to manageable. This was the start of my initiation into peri-menopause, that cursed period of life when you have no control over your own body.
Five years later after exhausting my options of birth control pills, iuds, and endometrial ablation to control my periods, I was so weakened by anemia that there were days it was hard to climb the stairs. My doctor never pushed, but gently offered the option of a hysterectomy as a way to avoid probably another 5 years of this craziness. The procedure would be an easy recovery since removal would take place through my vagina, and my ovaries would remain.
Surprisingly, I actually had enough nerve to ask what would happen to my sex life. From his experience working with women, he said, if you had a great sex life before, you will have a great sex life after. For women that had been miserable from all the nonsense of peri-menopause, it might even be better. Would I lose my orgasm? He responded, almost all of what you feel is from the outer third of the vagina and the clitoris, and that won’t be affected at all.
The procedure went well. I took it easy during the recovery and healed right on schedule. My husband and I were so relieved when I experienced an orgasm during clitoral stimulation the first time we tried. With new energy and freedom, I stepped into a new era of my life.
Up until my hysterectomy, I had only enjoyed clitoral orgasms, and honestly knew little of what my body was capable of. My clitoral orgasms still feel great, but sometimes I feel as if I am missing the bass speaker in a sound system. I no longer have a uterus and there used to be times when it would contract in unison during my orgasms, giving them a boost and a depth that no longer exists.
As for G-spot or any kind of vaginal orgasms, honestly I don’t have anything to compare them to. They feel great to me, but I have to stop myself from wondering if they would feel even better if I still had my uterus. It does no good to regret, but instead I must continue to explore and expect even more.
Looking back, I do wish I had done more research and asked more questions. There are tons of great sites on line to get started, like this. A fairly new method of going in through the abdomen laproscopically provides easy healing while giving a clear view to doctors, reducing the chance of nerve damage. Also,if you have the option, leaving your cervix can result in more sexual enjoyment. So do your research and find out what all your options are.
Am I glad I had a hysterectomy? I felt like I had exhausted all of my options for treatment. My choice was being miserable for at least the next five years, or taking care of the problem for good. Yes, I am glad I had it done.
What about my sex life? I no longer have a uterus or a cervix, so yes it is different, but it is still great. It is just different. I believe that my mind is my most important sex organ, so I choose to believe that what is ahead will be even greater.
Basically it comes down to weighing your options. Sometimes it is clear that a hysterectomy is the only option, and sometimes it is a hard decision that we make. Do your homework, and find the best doctor and the best procedure and don’t look back.
Whenever I bring it up, my husband always says, “ I’m glad you did it. I got my wife back.”
So what are your experiences with the change? What advice would you give to other women?